Portland Cider Razz Berry
Remember when the image of American summers were the existence of outdoor barbeques with thirty friends or outdoor adventures with white water rafting and angering your paid-tour guide by not listening to a damn word they said as you went down the river on your raft from a Class I to a Class IV with half of your folks not wearing life rafts or helmets, while screaming YOLO every five feet and trying to take selfies? The Portland Cider Razz Berry is like that. It starts off slow, easy to consume. After all, it’s made from loads of bright raspberries combined with Northwest apples. But much like when people get out of their twenties, its at this point that the Portland Cider Razz Berry starts to get interesting. There’s a touch of lemon zest that hits the back of your eyes, much like when that tree branch whacks the selfie stick out of one of your rafting buddies’ hands and it goes flying into the river. Everyone laughs, and then, they start to notice that that the raft is picking up speed. At first, they are excited, then slowly everyone realizes they probably don’t have the skillset to move further. That’s where you start to taste the Hood River Valley pears in the Portland Cider Razz Berry; it pushes you toward a refreshing wake-up call, much like seeing the sign along the river that you’ve entered into a Class VII stage of the river. You cannot abandon ship as your grandmother is on-board, the only one who wore a helmet but no life jacket, and who doesn’t know how to swim. And that’s when the Portland Cider Razz Berry really catches up speed with the tastebuds, as the tartness of semi-sweet cider acts like the raft guide, who catches up with you, manages to harpoon your rig to their own, and takes you back toward shore safely, all the while cussing you out and questioning how you got this far in life.